practicehacker

10. They’re only attracted to you when you play hard to get

9. They drop you the second something better comes along

8. They care more about looks than substance or character

7. They only want lawyers that claim to be experienced

6. They tell their friends when they aren’t satisfied

5. They won’t tell anyone when they are satisfied

4. They constantly play games with your emotions

3. They’re just in it for the money

2. They take more than they give

And the #1 reason that Clients are like hot girlfriends is:

1. Can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em!

With apologies and respect to the Humbled MBA, who did it first.

Disclaimer: I’m married to a hot woman who is nothing like this. Having said that …

Posted via email from practice (redux)

I generally avoid posting about far-fetched, Jestons-inspired stuff. Sure, someday computers will practice law, instant video conferencing with replace Court appearances and most of the people reading this post will be out of a job.  But until that day, law practice is still a job, more or less. Learning how lawyers might practice in 100 years is of marginal interest.  Of course that simple fact doesn’t stop professors and judges from using euphemisms like “law is a calling” or “the law is a profession.”  That sounds great until I try to pay my mortgage with the gratitude of a non-paying client or the respect of my peers. Then it’s every man for himself. That said, jut just this one time I noticed a conference (=waste of time) in Hong Kong (=expensive) sponsored by the University of Hong Kong (=foreign law with no bearing on real life) and just had to post about it. Feel free to enjoy it for about 10 seconds. Then get back to work. Posted via email from practice (redux)

via sociablelawyer.org

With his breakthrough performance in Kindergarten Cop, Arnold showed us why he would someday be Governor of California and leader of the free-world. Or whatever. In the meantime, here are some “baby steps” (get it, Kindergarten, baby steps?) to using social media in your practice, courtesy of Sociable Lawyer.

1. Do not be afraid to try
2. Share your knowledge
3. Polish your online rep
4. Strength in numbers

Posted via email from practice (redux)

Posted via email from practice (redux)

Normally I struggle to keep my disdain for this kind of crap bottled up, but … seriously. With a magnitude 9 earthquake this morning in the Pacific, people in mortal fear, and the world in need of serious help, the overfed California-Seattle brain trust bring us TED: the conference for people who are better than YOU.

Need proof that TED is put on by your social betters – the leaders of tomorrow, if you will? Consider these 10 blockbuster conclusions reached after days of furious debate, catered luncheons, then more debate, then a nap, and finally a wine-and-cheese party. Who can keep up with life-altering observations like:

Uh … yeah.

Posted via email from practice (redux)